Ats, Ebola is around and everyone is going berserk with theories in their heads about this dreadful dangerous virus. It’s humanly understandable to be very afraid after seeing pictures making the rounds about how you will die once you catch it. Eina! The wounds of victims I have seen look like the person has been pushed in the fire or thrown with hot water at one of those Tura braais at month-end when the night gets wild and everyone think they are Mike Tyson.
I wasn’t afraid until false rumours made the rounds on social networks that e-bola is in Namibia. Huuu Elotse, some people just know how to make others go crazy with worry. Even after the Ministry of Health cleared our suspicions and anxiety that the awful kamutjise didn’t reach our borders, I sat and imagined what would happen if this disease is transmitted to our country by people travelling from West Africa.
Ebola would spread faster than that MTC mannetjie. You know Namibians are very sociable people and even if the President declared a State of Emergency and cautioned people to rather stay indoors, I am not sure whether they would take heed.
Of course, there are those who would use the time wisely to take care of their children, give home-schooling, work from home and watch educational and religious movies with close family.
But the majority; tah! You know how we do when we hear holiday. Palkies and Goreangab Dam would be overcrowded every day. Those aamatis at Single Quarters’ kapana stands would be smiling all the way to the bank.
Herero Mall’s trading hours would be extended indefinitely just to give City Police more headaches. Rooster brood bakers would run out of flour in the Dal. Evelyn Street, ag, Evelyn Street would still be tot patji as usual.
By the time government realises the burden of non-productivity, hospitals and clinics would be filled to the brim; newspapers would be abuzz with prophets and priests claiming their ‘miracle’ healing powers. Hanakam, the kapana guy, the Shebeen Queen, the rooster brood madam or the petrol joggie spread the virus unknowingly.
Eish, I can only imagine what a bloodthirsty //gamare would do.
There would be no need to throw skimpe or break a bottle when their love rival comes in close proximity – just a swift exhale at the right moment in their direction, knowing the disease might be airborne?
Funerals won’t be the same anymore. They would become a close family affair because those chesters who must be at every funeral to show off their rides and juvis would be so scared to ‘mourn’ with you that they would find excuses to go to another makiti.
On the positive side though; life would become easy, especially to get rid of those outere friends who want everything you have, including sharing your make-up and sipping from your drink.
All you need to do is cough in their face and say that you have a little bit of Ebola.
I hope that this virus will just remain an e-bola secluded to social networks, thanks to our Ministry of Health, which is taking every possible precaution.
So, to those who love to cause panic in others, stop it already – don’t wish for things that you don’t want or know. Some people might take things to heart and start walking around with plastic bags wrapped around their faces like they just escaped from mal kamp to avoid catching the virus.
Sorry Ngo!
magreth@newera.com.na.Sorry Ngo!
mnunuhe@newera.com.na
Magreth Nunuhe