By Hilma Himotha
WINDHOEK-When bad things happen they leave people traumatised, devastated and hopeless.
Erika Embashu has been struggling with upsetting emotions, frightening memories and a constant sense of danger after a fateful incident on June 6, 2012 in her room in the Khomasdal residential area of the capital. The untimely and cruel death of her best friend, Elizabeth Tuwilika Ekandjo, has left a deep wound that has been taking time to heal, and which still hunts her at times. “When I switched on the light and saw her lying on the ground I felt like I was having anightmare. I was feeling numb, confused and could not make sense of what was happening,” says Embashu.
The incident shattered her sense of security left her with constant nightmares and hallucinations for a couple of months and still now since the incident. “Every time I am alone I always see the accused’s image like he is coming towards me to attack me. When I am in public I act brave as if everything is fine but when I am alone I always think of it and it destructs me from whatever I am doing and I would start crying.” Embashu says the incident had affected her studies as she was about to start with her examinations at the Polytechnic of Namibia at the time, “but the situation forced me to skip my exam because I could not bear the anguish. It is really disturbing and I will forever live with that memory. It tormented me for months that my parents had to take me to see a psychologist.”
“Back then I only used to think it happens to the dirty kandeshis but now I know it can happen to anyone. One will only understand when it happens to your sister, cousin or best friend. I have known the Tuwilika for nine years since high school and we have been best friends since then.”
She believes the sentence that Gabriel Jana Petrus, who was sentenced to 50 years imprisonment recently, received, is fair and sufficient enough for him to realise what he has done and to allow him time to redeem himself. Embashu describes the convict as a quiet person and she never noticed any kind of ill behaviour towards the deceased except that he was a jealous type. “But relationships are unpredictable, one moment you see happy couples around you and next thing you hear ‘passion killing’,” she says.
Having been in that situation where she lost her best friend due to ‘passion killing’, one would feel unsafe, disconnected and unable to trust others but Embashu says “it did not really affect me relationship wise. Yes it brought in some fear in me but when you have all your faith in the Lord, he will always be there to protect you. I feel safe.”