Growing up, I was the child who wore many hats. I was both an introvert and an extrovert. I was both talkative, yet very withdrawn. I found comfort in spending time alone reading books, discovering worlds I would never travel, by authors I would never meet.
Yet, I too found great joy in the company of others and enjoyed time spent debating on world issues. I was involved in societies that were parallel to one another. On the one hand I was on the soccer team, whilst heading the history society and simultaneously sitting on the debating society. My personality was diverse, and although this could be a good thing, as a child trying to find my footing in who I truly am, it was petrifying.
My personality continually pulled at me because I was interested in so many different areas. As I grew older, it did not get any better.
I couldn’t seem to find what fit, because none of the career paths I pursued could fully satisfy the diversity of my personality.
I was in university studying civil engineering at the time I took up a job as a radio personality. This opened doors to becoming a master of ceremonies, which additionally took me to national stages as a motivational speaker.
This gave birth to my blog, which is aimed at speaking to young adults, which then brought me to a need to start-up a charity foundation. And that opened up the door to sit on the board of directors for the foundation of the First Lady of Namibia.
Time and time again, my personality pulled me in different directions. My time was no longer my own, because there was always something to do and such little time. I took on so much that I started to spread myself thin, and what was once excellently executed became subpar work.
Being a Queens Young Leader 2018 award winner, has given me the opportunity to learn about myself. Learning to master a diverse personality is challenging, but there are five key lessons I have learnt through the programme that make it easier to manage my personality.
FIVE KEY LESSONS FOR DIVERSE PERSONALITIES
MASTER YOUR EMOTIONS
Emotional intelligence (EQ) is the cousin of intelligence quotient (IQ), but we hear more about IQ than we do EQ.
However, the thing that governs our reaction to everyday life is EQ and our emotions can get the better of us if not managed accurately.
Learning to master your emotions gives you the ability to control your reaction to matters that arise unplanned. When faced with a challenge – and emotions of defeat – a diverse personality plunges you into the challenge, unprepared and unplanned, because of the intense desire to be good at everything.
However, it is not humanly possible to master all things. Learning to have better control of your emotions puts you in a position to have better control over the direction of your life.
FIND A NORTH STAR
A north star is your biggest dream. It is the dream and goal that is near impossible, yet it is something you want to achieve.
In your life, identify what your north star is and work towards making it a reality, so that all your actions from this point forward, bring you one step closer to your north star.
This will eliminate clutter and activities you may want to get involved in that do not speak to your north star. It helps you mainstream your goals and activities.
LEARN HOW TO SAY NO
The art of saying no is something we are constantly taught and yet, rarely master.
It is learning to say no to the things that could potentially take up your time but are not beneficial to your north star.
Learning how to say no liberates you and frees up your time to give you time to work on the important areas of your life.
THERE IS A TIME FOR EVERYTHING
Identify a timeline. It is not wise to do everything at the same time, because somethings are better set out as future plans and goals.
Having a dream and goals timeline can properly outline that vision – allowing you peace of mind, because you know that, even if it is not being done right now, it is not forgotten. There is a time for everything.
*Mavis Braga Elias is a Civil Engineer by qualification and a Marketing Officer by profession. A philanthropist of heart and founder of the EM Love Foundation. She won the Vivid Philanthropist award in 2015 and the Queens Leaders Awards 2018. Find her on Twitter -@mavisbraga