People who are grieving the loss of a loved one can be assisted in various ways, but there is nothing that comes close to having a support group of people with similar circumstances in the circle to grieve with.
This is what motivated Micky Kaapama (27) to start a psychosocial support group for people who have lost their loved ones to Covid-19. She says talking to an expert seemed to be too costly for her as she found it difficult to navigate through life after losing her mother to Covid-19.
“I started this group because a few months ago, although it just feels like it was just yesterday, I lost my mom to Covid-19. The whole experience from the moment she was diagnosed up until she died was traumatic,” stated Kaapama.
She said: “Seeing someone you love with your whole heart not being able to breathe shatters your soul completely. It was extremely hard to deal with the loss, with having to look for a coffin the very next day, and [immediately] start arranging her funeral as the mortuary was overwhelmed. It was tragic.”
She barely sleeps at night, gets panic attacks now and then, and it feels like the whole thing is a nightmare.
The Biotechnology graduate said she knew that she was not the only one going through this, based on the Covid-19 statistics of last year.
“I am not the only one who some nights was crying myself to sleep, and I also believe that talking to people who have had a similar experience will somehow help us cope with and share the pain, and show us a way to heal from this trauma. It will make a significant difference. I want to help others and myself as well.”
Kaapama attempted talking to a specialist and seeking help, but it became costly.
“I just focused on taking care of myself, my daughters and younger sister. Music also helped me get in touch with my emotions a lot, as well as cry when I needed to,” she recalled.
“Plus, I think my bubbly personality has made it easier for me because I find a lot of joy in making people laugh. So, making people laugh also makes me laugh, and laughing is a form of therapy to me. I’m also very grateful to have very supportive friends, family and colleagues”, she added.
To date, the group has over 50 Namibians from across the country.
“I have reached out to a few organisations that I know of, which are willing to do pro bono work. One of them responded and stated their interest,” shared Kaapama.
She added that grief isn’t something one just deals with, and believes that it’s a feeling of pain that comes when one thinks of the person they have lost.
“Grief is a natural process. It allows us to deal with pain and free energy that is attached to the pain of losing a loved one so that we can focus on moving on. Loss teaches us about love, survival and resilience. One will be able to realise this after one has dealt with grief. If not dealt with, grief can cause physical pain and result in severe mental health problems,” Kaapama stated.