My departed old man and I always had time to exchange pleasantries over the fire when all other younger siblings would go to bed. 

While I would take time to tell him about my life in the city and my exchanges (and experiences) with other ethnic groups in Namibia, he would masterfully, like a skilled wordsmith that he was, tell me about the nature of “Ne xub ≠Nukhoeba”. 

Although I would not agree with some of his theories as a proud ≠Nukhoe that I am, his theorising stuck and were surprisingly proven to be true.

There was a day that I told him about an advert on a public noticeboard that read ‘Rooms to rent. Please, no Damaras’. 

I told him that I took serious offence to this, removed the notice, and called the contact number to express my dismay at how tribal he is. My intention was for him to note how seriously victimised we are as ≠Nukhoe in the capital. 

His reply, which I came to realise is abhorrently true, was that I would not have attacked the person if I knew that “≠Nukhoeb is by nature a person who likes to break down an unlocked door to enter only to buy a new door the next day to fix it”. 

I totally disagreed with him on that score of course but eventually realised that he was using a proverbial syntax. As I was navigating through life, I realised that it is the institutions traditionally owned by the ≠Nukhoe people that are mainly compromised. 

For example, the issue of Black Africa and Orlando Pirates Football Clubs (we had Namib Woestyn, Explorer Eleven and United Stars at the coast). 

The subsequent relegation is something that undoubtedly proved my old man right. 

Sadly, it is not because those at the helm are unskilled but because of the ‘breaking-the-door-down’ mentality of our people.

Also, there are approximately 54 Gazzetted traditional authorities in Namibia, of which nine are from various ≠Nukhoe clans. 

Eight of these have concerned groups that are hell-bent on removing the leadership (one door) and replacing themwith another. None of the traditional authorities in the other ethnic groups have enjoyed so much publicity on conflicts. Young ≠Nukhoe people spent a lifetime fighting elderly traditional leaders and accusing them of some faults that occurred in their own upbringing. 

I also had some personal experiences with the other ethnic groups as a ≠Nukhoe. 

I remember when I was the only person of the ≠Nukhoe origin in a village called Onandjaba, Okalongo, in 2000 as a teacher. 

One day, I gave the grade 11s a task as an English teacher,which they found difficult.

I became visibly annoyed. I started screaming and scolding. There was this little girl (a seasoned teacher now) in front shivering. She could not express herself or answer any question. 

In fact, none of the learners were able to talk. Later, I found out from the principal that the children are raised to fear a Damara because “if you make a Damara angry, he may easily kill you” – of course it is stereotyping. 

This confirms the belief that the other ethnic groups have some condescending and other praiseworthy views about the ≠Nukhoe like the smartness, intellect and cleanliness. However, the ≠Nukhoe has stooped to the level of self-destruct. 

I believe that if the ≠Nukhoe learn to respect their institutions, enhance conflict and dispute resolution techniques, focus on substance over form and unite on matters that will enhance their communities, this country will be very prosperous.

*Martin Matsuib is a retired teacher, writer and a freelance training consultant. He is an alumnus from the Academy of Tertiary Education (now Unam. He is currently the national coordinator of the Namibian Education Coalition and is currently involved in a project to enhance the development of indigenous languages in Namibia.