Does emotional intelligence matter to you as much as it matters to your employer? The term emotional intelligence has been enjoying popular demand since the late 90s to an extent that some employers believe it is more needed than traditional intelligence (Intelligence Quotient- IQ) as we all know it.
Emotional intelligence has been defined by many as an individual capacity to recognise and manage their feelings, identify emotions and respond effectively to those of self and others.
It is, therefore, no surprise for many of us that by the definition above, we would fail if we do not ask how often we pause and give time to our feelings and emotions, and recognise them before action. Equally important to ponder on is, which learning system this emphasised an important skill or tool to possess in life. In recent years, the concept has been used in many boardrooms, interview rooms and workspaces. This has been popularised by many CEOs around the world – one key quote that caught my eye was by the previous CEO of Nokia Rajeev Suri, who said “Leadership is all about emotional intelligence. Management is taught, while leadership is experienced”.
Various theorists have dedicated their time to the development of this concept, for the sake of focus, we will centre on the one developed by Daniel Goleman. At first, he introduced five domains/components which later during the early 2000s it was re-introduced in form of a quadrant namely; self-awareness, self-management, social-awareness and relationship management. So in essence the four parts insect each other, and on the left side focus is on the self (self-awareness and self-management) and on the opposite side of the quadrant focus is on others (social-awareness and relationship management).
So let us zoom in on the concept of EQ. How is the importance of this emphasised within your workplace; within your family settings? Is it relevant if at all? In his book ‘Primal Leadership: Realising the Importance of Emotional Intelligence’, Daniel Goleman (2002) highlights that in primitive the root of all leadership should be based on emotional intelligence.
He argues if leaders understand themselves, under their emotions, self-assessment and confidence, including emotional self-control, transparency, adaptability and having an optimistic culture, they will consequently contribute to their team in a greater sense.
They will thus be able to lead with empathy and genuine service. They will also have a much bigger sense of organisational awareness and therefore influence, inspire and develop talent amongst their team. Issues such as conflict management, teamwork and collaboration will be building blocks to change and all team members can be the catalyst of positive change.
Well, one can argue that the case, in reality, does our leaders portray a healthy sense of emotional intelligence. As human beings what we know is that emotions just are, and due to injustice or unfair treatment around us, it can easily trigger frustration, anger or else distress.
As Goleman terms it the so-called ‘amygdala hijack’, can naturally happen to anyone as it is the centre of the brain that regulates emotional behaviour. Let us remain grounded and be reminded that it is possible, to start with self-awareness, know your triggers, and know your emotional temperament by self-assessment. We have all heard of famous saying such as: ‘your attitude determines your altitude’, and my personal favourite: ‘IQ can get you hired, but EQ gets you promoted’.
We need to expose young people as early as possible to issues of inspirational leadership, teamwork, self-confidence, empathy, transparency, adaptability, conflict management, communication, diversity management, problem-solving, negotiation skills and many others.
The above are considered essential skills to possess in contemporary society and workplaces that aim at remaining relevant and innovative. Let our family reunions, friend outings and workplace meetings centre on these important topics.