WINDHOEK – When 30-year old Immanuel Sheefeni was diagnosed with HIV last July he thought it was the end of his life.
“I felt bad, I felt like I was gone … like I was no more,” Sheefeni told New Era recently.
The first eight days of finding out he has the virus were the most overwhelming, he reminisced.
Not only was Sheefeni suicidal but he developed a strong hatred towards women and he contemplated spreading the virus.
“ It’s just the fact that I know I got it from them (women), all these girls … you know,” he says with deep emotion.
But, as fate would have it, Sheefeni bounced back and is using his life experience to educate the nation by raising awareness on HIV in whatever setting he finds himself.
“After the eight days I started doing some research. I started counselling myself, seeking help and then I started talking to different people,” he tells.
Not long after that, Sheefeni broke the news to his family and friends. “Family was there since day one and friends too,” he says.
At first, his friends did not take him seriously.
“They know me as someone who likes to make jokes so for the first three months they took it as a joke. But with time they started to see how serious I am,” he says.
He explains some withdrew temporarily as they did not know how to relate to him.
“ Few withdrew but I felt like it was still my responsibility. I didn’t blame them, it was my responsibility to educate them more (on HIV),” he says, adding that he also gave them space to digest the news.
He also announced his HIV-positive status publicly on social networks, namely Facebook, he says.
Earlier this year, Sheefeni walked from Ongwediva to Windhoek in a quest to create awareness on HIV/AIDS and at times he does HIV awareness creation at parties and night clubs.
He also gives motivational talks on HIV in different parts of the country mainly by sharing his story.
He publicly disclosed his status because he wants to kill the stigma associated with HIV/AIDS. “I look at myself and say the fear that is in me is probably in other people,” he adds, stressing why it was crucial for him to publicly reveal his status.
Sheefeni added that “disclosure is the only way that we can end the spread of HIV. The more people come out about their status the more visible the virus becomes.”
He adds that it is also a strategy to let people know that HIV is real and not a farfetched thing.
“I’ve never heard of anybody close to me that came out saying they are HIV positive and I never heard of anybody in my family or friends that died of AIDS. It was something that was living in another world not in my world, so I decided to stand up and be the practical example to my peers,” he explained.
Many people also started disclosing their status to him and commending him for his bravery.
But there were also those who negatively criticised him, he reminisced.
“Since I came out public 300 people disclosed their HIV-positive status to me and some of them also disclosed to their families. Some have been living with the virus for seven years without telling anyone. I don’t know how someone can live that way without telling anyone,” he says, adding that the more he talks about HIV, the lighter the burden of this incurable malady becomes.
The father of one says when it comes to loving relationships, he makes it a point to reveal he is HIV positive, if he has a romantic interest in a woman.
“I have made it a habit when I meet a lady I know I like, before I start showing her my interest, to make sure I let her know of my status so that she is very much comfortable, just for her to make an informed decision,” he says.
Sheefeni stressed it is important for people to know their HIV status “so that they can get the necessary support and treatment available and to avoid spreading the virus if they have it.” Meanwhile, Sheefeni says government is doing a tremendous job in the fight against HIV.
“In terms of awareness we are doing well as a country, especially government. But the private sector waits for World AIDS Day – that is when they react (to fighting the disease),” he says.
In terms of behaviour, Sheefeni says young people are careful when it comes to HIV prevention.
But he is quick to add that alcohol and drug abuse is one way people expose themselves to HIV because they become reckless.
Also, some people judge by appearance and conclude the HIV status of their potential partners. “There are a lot of thin people who are not HIV positive and there are a lot of fat people who actually have the virus,” he says.
By Alvine Kapitako