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SOUL FOOD – Overcome trust issues

Home Youth Corner SOUL FOOD – Overcome trust issues

 

 

I have noticed commonly among my peers (young people) how it has become hard to form and maintain meaningful relationships because of the inability to trust someone.

 

In most cases this is a result of being hurt or betrayed in the past. So the individual who was hurt puts up a wall around themselves and avoid having people in their personal space so they do not give someone a chance to hurt them again. As unfortunate as one is for being hurt, it is also unfortunate that having trust issues is one of the most dangerous self-distracting acts.

Most of us have been hurt, just as much as most of us have hurt other people too. Sometimes we have even hurt and hate ourselves for some reasons. Interpersonal relationships among people are very complex and a lot happened when we are interacting with others. Sometimes others rub us off unintentionally in a way that we do not like. We become hurt, feeling betrayed and angry. It is these experiences that cause us not to want to interact with people at a personal level.

 

This then becomes dangerous because from anger and hurt stems other destructing behaviours such as committing evil acts toward others intentionally or withdrawing ourselves from people who care and love us. People with trust issues question everything done for them. It is hard for them to be grateful because they believe the good deed is just a cover up for the bad one committed behind their backs. Having trust issues is like carrying a sack of bricks around that none can see. The load becomes so heavy that you lose peace with everyone that is in your life or making effort to come into your life. People with trust issues are always in a defence mode. They believe everyone is out to get them so they will try to find quick answers to puzzles they cannot solve. They are ready to press the accusation button anytime they can get the person out of their lives before they get hurt.

 

It is wise to ask clarity were you do not understand and give people a chance to tell their side of the story. Never make assumptions to fill the gaps just because you have been hurt before. For trust to be formed there should be respect, consistency and understanding, hence you need to show these for people to trust you. Trust is a two way street so do not just expect the other person to trust you but you do not trust them. You should also be able to trust yourself. Believe you are worth it, you are capable of making good decisions and you have something valuable to others. If you do not heal your trust issues, with time you become bitter and lonely.  You can acquire success, wealth or social recognition but it will break you to come home to empty house. It is these personal moments at home that really define how fulfilled our lives are.