WINDHOEK– Me on the other hand, I started going to clubs in my first year of varsity, I even stopped going to church, I was still loud and outgoing, only this time I was so caught up in life, I had new cool friends to complement my new life, I had my own place, a meal card at school( free meals anywhere on campus), and a monthly allowance from my bursary, I could now also afford nice clothes and good food, I even had a boyfriend. I was living the life it seems. But I ended up falling pregnant in my second year of varsity and had a broken relationship after that. So I had my baby and had to slow down because I was a single mother now. I then started living for my daughter only and decided to take my studies seriously because it got tough, my pocket money now had to be shared between the baby and I including everything else I got from my twin sister, my daughters father and my family. After school I had to rush home to release the nanny, I couldn’t afford nice clothes anymore, I was back to basics. But my strong personality which I acquired during my high school years wouldn’t let me conform, I still wanted more from life, I now had to sit myself down and think… was this it? No! This was not it, there was more to life and it could only be achieved through prayer, hard work and determination I realised, but what did I have? I had God, a beautiful baby girl, her father was also very supportive, and a roof over our heads, tuition fees paid in full, a meal card at school, pocket money, a supportive best friend and family, as well as the opportunity to still continue my studies. I counted my blessings and used them to my advantage, I made the decision to put dating on hold as I could not afford to be in any relationship at the time, I couldn’t afford another heart break, I had to focus. I joined small study groups at school because I couldn’t attend all my classes all the time, sometimes the nanny just wouldn’t show up or my daughter was not well that day, so I desperately needed to belong to a study group so that I could get updates. We met often and studied together, sometimes at my place; they were very patient with me and very supportive, they helped me where I didn’t understand and step by step we moved at the same pace, one of them reminded me of my twin sister and she graduated with a cum laude, top of our class. I wish them all nothing but the very best in life. It was a process but it needed to be completed.
The lesson that I took away from this valuable experience was that, in life we will get what we bargain for. If you as a young person concern yourself with a busy life, casual life, party life and boyfriends while you are in school, don’t be surprised when you attract the kind of life that involves everything that comes with (drugs+ diseases+ unhealthy life styles), or (having a baby or children while you are still young, abortions and baby dumping). If you concern yourself with a goal orientated life then you will attract good opportunities like bursaries, great jobs and even bigger opportunities like traveling and exploring the world. I was lucky because I was both goals orientated and naughty (for a lack of a better term).
Today I don’t regret any of those experiences because they have taught me great lessons, lessons that nobody could ever take away from me. MY STORIES ARE MY TREASURES. They are what set me apart from other young people. What do you have at your disposal right now? Is it a bad child hood experience? Is it a beautiful and memorable experience? Use it cautiously to take you to the next level in life. Do not despise where you are now or where you have been, it is all part of the process. The bible says “For no temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. But God is faithful; he will not allow you to be tempted beyond your abilities. Instead, with the temptation, God will also supply a way out so that you will be able to endure it “. God will never give you anything that is too hard for you to bear, if you follow my story closely you will realise that I had bad experiences but there was always a way out, it wasn’t clear to me immediately but as I prayed through it I started to see this way much clearer. In life you will always have two options; to settle and accept the present circumstance and live there, or to go through it and leave it behind, I chose to continue with my studies and use what I had to my advantage so I can leave it behind, I didn’t blame God for how things turned out, Instead I moved with God. Situations are never exactly alike, and my own experience may not be as bad as yours, or maybe it was much worse, but it all depends on how you look at it, and how much importance you place on it. I chose to place less importance on the bad and more importance on the good could come out of it. No situation is ever permanent in life, Bad things will happen but so will good things; so make the decision today to move to the next level, move with the process. MOVE ON! Life is a journey (but a journey to where? Where are you going? ) and your supplies and resources for this journey are what you have currently, (what do you have at your disposal now? is it your education, your job, your business or simply your hopes and your dreams?). Work with what you have now. The next supplies are at the next level, so we never really stop learning; refuse to remain at the same level. Get moving. You have a life to live (journey to complete). Make the choice today to move to the next stage of your learning experience.
Sesilia Nekwaya is a young economist at the Bank of Namibia whose dream is to make a difference in someone’s life, whether big or small. Writing this article, Nekwaya hopes this article speaks in greater volumes.