Man chronicles abuse of mother by father

Home International Man chronicles abuse of mother by father

Windhoek

A 23-year-old man shared painful memories of witnessing his father beat his mother in front of him as a child and spoke of how this has shaped his life.

Iipinge Shaanika Nashilongo has since formed an anti-violence organization, called Monica Gender Violence Solution (MGVS).

Nashilongo explained that he named the organisation after the first Lady Monica Geingos, who inspires him, and for her involvement in the fight against gender-based violence (GBV).

The young man recounted how, as a child, he witnessed his father beat his mother. “I keep seeing those bad images of my mother being abused and much more abuse happened to me and her,” he said.

However, he said this has helped him gain the needed experience to assist women and children in the same situation. “There was a time when he ran away from home after he had severely beaten my mother,” Nashilongo recalled.

“During this period, I was alone with her and she could not walk. She just lay there until a neighbour came to our rescue after not seeing any movement at our house for days.”

The organisation was formed on October 7 last year, with the aim of fighting crime and GBV and to encourage and motivate fellow youth to complete their schooling.

Nashilongo also offers individual and couple counselling. The young man has six people who assist him to operate from his rented space in Havana informal settlement.

The organisation also operates from five regions, including Windhoek, Omusati, Ohangwena, Oshikoto and Oshana, he said.

Nashilongo also counsels and deters young pregnant girls from terminating their pregnancies. He said most girls consider abortion, because the baby father is absent, they are struggling financially or the girl’s father threatened to kill or chase her from the house.

The organisation also works with rape victims and offers necessary support to file criminal charges. “We also conduct workshops on everything related to GBV and on women’s self-defense methods”.

Nashilongo uses funds from small projects, such as printing T-shirts and repairing computers to pay the rent, take care of other needs and to build his organisation.

He says musician Exit – real name David Shikalepo – has been assisting the organisation as well.

Nashilongo further said the organisation is working on a movie project to educate youth in the rural areas, who think they will get a good job in the city after failing Grade 10.

“It will also show them the city life of young female students dating several men at the same time to pay rent, as well as for clothes and school fees”.

In addition, to the abuse his mother suffered, after the beatings his mother’s relatives relocated her to the north where she passed away shortly afterwards during 1997 due to the injuries sustained.

Nashilongo was then raised by his maternal grandmother in the north.  As a child he would ask his grandmother why his father does not visit or buy him clothes like other children.

“Sometimes she told me that she is my mother and father and that’s how I got the name Nashilongo, which is her surname,” he explained.

Asked how the relationship is with his father, he said: “Not good. I do respect him and love him, but he doesn’t care about me. He doesn’t even answer my calls.”