The boy child is often perceived as strong, emotionless and resilient by default. Society has painted a picture of a man who must endure silently, provide without complaint, and succeed without faltering. But today, I want to say to every boy and man reading this: you are allowed to feel, seek help and grow into the person God has created you to be with strength.

Yes, but also with vulnerability and purpose.

In Namibia, today, we are losing many boys and young men to suicide, substance abuse, crime and hopelessness. 

Sadly, most of these tragedies happen in silence. 

A young man may be struggling in school, facing rejection, unemployment, pressure from family or heartbreak, and yet smile as if all is well. 

This facade has become dangerous.

We must understand that some boys do not drink because they want to, but they are escaping something. 

Some are quiet because they are battling a war within. 

As fellow men, brothers, teachers, parents and leaders, we must learn to observe, notice and ask, Are you really okay? 

Let us check on our brothers. Let us sit down with our sons. Look at their behaviour. Is he unusually quiet? Is he always isolated? Is he failing where he used to succeed?

Biblical models 

Let us look at the Bible for some practical examples. 

David, known as a man after God’s own heart, was a warrior and king.

 But he was also a boy who faced rejection from his brothers and his father. 

In 1 Samuel 17, when David showed up at the battlefield, his brother Eliab ridiculed him. 

But David did not let that stop him. 

He focused on the assignment, not the opinions of others. 

He asked, “Is there not a cause?” 

That is what every boy child should ask. What is my cause? Focus on your dream, even when the people closest to you do not believe in it.

Joseph is another example. 

He was sold by his own brothers and thrown into prison. 

Yet, he never lost sight of his dream. Despite betrayal and injustice, he rose to greatness (Genesis 37-41).

Boys must understand that betrayal and hardship do not define their destiny. 

What matters is how you respond. 

Be strategic like Joseph. 

When life throws you into the pit, keep your eyes on the palace.

And let us not forget Jesus. 

He wept. He prayed. He was strong, but He was also vulnerable. 

In the Garden of Gethsemane, He opened up to His friends and God about His fears. 

It is not a weakness to open up. It is wisdom. 

Boys, talk to someone you trust. Whether it is a teacher, parent, pastor or friend. Speak up before the pain consumes you.

Namibian reality 

Namibia is a beautiful nation, but our boys are suffering in silence.

 From the streets of Katutura to the corners of Oshakati, Outapi, Rundu and Keetmanshoop, you will find boys battling hidden battles. 

Two young men recently took their lives for reasons unknown. 

Another turned to alcohol because of pressure to “man up” without guidance. These are not stories from afar. 

They are our neighbours, our sons and our students.

Boys are taught to “act tough” – to never cry, and to always provide. 

But how will he provide if no one ever provided him with love, purpose and direction? 

How will he become a leader if no one ever led him with understanding?

To the outsiders, if you see a boy child changing behaviour, withdrawing, suddenly quiet or aggressive, do not ignore it. 

That is not just adolescence.

 Sometimes, it is depression. 

Sometimes, it is pain. 

Let us create a society where a boy can say ‘I’m not okay’ without being laughed at. 

Let us normalise healing, not hiding.

Parents not only discipline the boy child, but also guide them. 

Sit down with him and understand what he is going through. 

Teachers, do not just label a boy as a troublemaker. 

Ask why? Communities, churches and mentors, be present. 

Let us raise a generation of men who are not just survivors but leaders, lovers of peace and creators of hope.

Words alone are no longer enough. 

We have said a lot, written a lot and promised a lot. 

But as we say in Oshiwambo, “Ombepo otayi monika po yelelo”. 

The wind is felt through its actions.

We are good with words more than with actions. 

But today, I am making it clear: something must be done.

To every boy child out there, you matter. Your story matters. Your future is valid. You can still rise. And to every man out there, mentor one boy. Save one life. 

*Balasius Shikongo is an educator, researcher and advocate for the boy child empowerment.