IT is disheartening to experience a decaying society in which we, as parents, have opted for the easy way out – neglecting our responsibility of parenting, directing, guiding and caring. The list is indeed endless, depending on who one talks to as far as child rearing is concerned.
In this article, I express myself on what I have experienced in the past 28 years of my involvement in the teaching and learning business. I simply want to tell it as it is! I cannot help but step on the toes of all of us parents!
My experience has taught me that we in authority, be it in our homes, at educational institutions, or even in “government” offices, neglect our “duties”. We actually run away from our responsibilities. We have demonstrated loss of confidence in ourselves, unable to bring up our children properly. Our children are now in control. They tell us what they want and we provide. Not only do they dictate how we should treat them, but they have gone even too far to tell us how we should run our homes! We are enslaved and are put on a leash by our own ‘kids’. Sadly, we have become victims of our own children in our homes. Who do we blame? I boldly point the finger of blame at no one but squarely at us.
Imagine a situation where a child demands an expensive cell phone while the parent only has “okatoshe” Nokia. But ironically the parent goes ahead to buy this classy gadget. We see children put on N$1 000 worth of shoes from Street House. They call them Grasshopers, All-Stars, Addidas, and Nike. I am stunned by how the list of these new brands has galvanised our young people, despite their purchasing power that amounts to zero. The parents are then reduced to inferior quality shoes from Pep Stores. We have become the victims of the decisions we took on have children.
For the 53 years that I’ve been in existence, I’ve watched the society, especially here in the ‘Land of the Brave’, degrading every minute.
Vividly, I can still remember how I was brought up by my parents with an iron fist. I survived the blows and I am happy about it. That harshness made me what I am today. It is with a heavy heart that I mention that at senior secondary level of education, where I work some learners cannot fill in forms or provide us with necessary information about their parents. They would refer us to their parents. This is because parents are the ones looking for places for their children. Even for learners in Matric. In fact, we enrol learners without seeing their faces. Parents are doing everything for them. This leads to confrontation between parents and teachers at times.
The society into which we are turning makes me sick sometimes. It further sickens me to witness government, especially Ministry of Education, allow schools to “select” learners for admission to public schools. We all know that a conducive environment of both teaching and learning needs to be nurtured. Indiscipline has become the order of the day. However, for selective schools the situation is far different from that of the take all schools. I believe in educating every Namibian child from 0-100 percent. I don’t select. I am proud if I move a child from 0 percent to 10 percent, I have made a change in a Namibian child.
Those in authority are even afraid to confront children at schools. I don’t see them addressing the right “person” of the “three-legged” pot. They focus more on the teacher – poor us. Sometimes parents also share the tongue-lashing censure. Remember, “You can take a horse to the river, but if the horse does not want to drink, all the efforts are in vain”.
Let us go back to the basics! Let us do the right things. Let us try teaching, helping, guiding, and directing our children no matter the circumstances. We should not spoil the CHILD and spare the ROD.
Kambwila Ka Hamupembe
Teacher, HoD (Sciences)
Ella du Plessis High School