‘Do not do as I do; do as I tell you!’ Every one of us has heard this statement very often. It does not matter whether we have heard it once, twice, 10 times or a thousand times, but it is still not true!
Instead, they will behave as they see you behaving. This underlines the importance of good behaviour patterns and people – whether they are our children, employees or colleagues – will tend to do as they see us doing as opposed to what we tell them to do.
Heroes can and should be a lifelong source of inspiration and motivation for us. Many of the most famous and influential people we know let great men and women shape their lives well into their adulthood, and so can we. Long before he ever became a Beatle, John Lennon idolised many of the old rhythm and blues greats, people like Church Berry and Muddy Waters.
He had their pictures on his wall and used them as inspiration when he first began playing guitar. In this way, he could imagine that he began playing guitar. In this way, he could imagine that he was them. This process is not just idle daydreaming; it allows new creature ideas to be released from the subconscious. It allows us to move beyond our preconceived limitations. It is an excellent process for developing inspiration and creativity.
Singer Whitney Houston watched her older cousin Dionne Warwick release hit after hit and dreamed of one day being just like her. She was fortunate in that she had a family member to model herself after as she worked her way toward eventual superstardom. She could go into the recording studios, see Dionne perform alive and watch how she handled different situations.
All this had a tremendous impact on Houston, but you do not have to know the person to model yourself after him or her, nor do you even have to meet that person. Few of us get that chance, yet we can still use inspirational individuals as our role models.
We all need to know that what we are trying to accomplish can be achieved. Perhaps it will take an almost superhuman effort, but we have to believe that if we harness all our resources and determination, it can be done. That is what our role models, heroes, can do for us; they can prove to us that our goals are not impossible.
According to the University of Namibia vice chancellor, Kenneth Matengu, “Boys are not doing well in school because they do not have role models. The fathers are absent and they are the ones who invite them (boys) to the farms” (The Namibian, 25 April 2023). I believe that fathers in Namibia should approach prevention differently with the view of loving their children unconditionally and passionately – even placing their children’s needs and happiness before their own.
This necessarily meant that fathers should take an interest in their children’s lives and be involved enough to render protection and guidance to their children whenever needed.
Research has indicated that children with fathers who were actively involved throughout the child’s first year performed better on cognitive development assessments and demonstrated an increased capacity for curiosity and exploration (Child Crisis Arizona, 5 July 2017).
Moreover, children raised with active dads tend to score higher on verbal and math tests, and they are less likely to drop out of school or commit juvenile crimes exploration (Child Crisis Arizona, 5 July 2017).
Being there for your child while respecting and nurturing him or her along the way is the absolute way to ensure your child is safe and provide him/her with the best life possible.
Therefore, when we model ourselves after those who have achieved greatness, we take on their character, strengths and determination. Soon, their success leads to our success – and in the process, we better ourselves. Role modelling is an effective and powerful step in achieving, and a powerful step in achieving success, because it supplies us with inspiration, and encourages us to move as a society beyond our temporary failures.
With the above in mind, I am also reminded of Jesus Christ’s conversation with Peter in Matthew 16:13-20, in which Jesus asks him, “Who do you say I am?”. Although this seems like a simple question, it is deeply existential and profound. Ultimately, Jesus wanted Peter to see that others know us – not only by what we say but how we act.
I would love to quote and leave you with the words of Joe Biden, USA President, who said: “Lead by the Power of your example and not by the example of your power”.
*Reverend Jan A Scholtz is the former chairperson of the //Kharas Regional Council and former !Nami#nus constituency councillor. He holds a Diploma in Theology, B-Theo (SA), a Diploma in Youth Work and Development from the University of Zambia (UNZA), and a Diploma in Education III (KOK) BA (HED) from UNISA.