Salomo N. yaNdeshimona

The article you are about to read is inspired by true events, a sign that our society is putrefying faster – right under our nose, and all we do is watch. 

A mother of eight children lived in a village somewhere in Namibia. 

Together with her husband, they brought up all the children. 

They were sent to school, clothed – and not a single day passed without them having their daily meals. 

The parents gave up all to ensure their children are educated, clothed and never malnourished. 

The children grew, finished school and became successful in life. 

Some became nurses, doctors, engineers, business moguls, and so on. 

They later drifted away and made families of their own, leaving the two parents alone – just the two of them in their deserted house of two rooms.

 The parents grew weary, old and lived a pauper life like they have no children. 

The Awambo people have a saying: “Kayuhwena hadhela nyoko, nyoko onale eku hadhele”. 

This translates, the chick shall peck for the hen, for the hen has pecked long enough for it when it was young. 

For these two parents in this narrative, this saying was never a reality, for the chick abandoned them as if they were never cared for by the parents. 

They grew old enough; neighbors looked after them, as well as passer-by that cared to mind until the good Lord salvaged them off their pauper life on the same day. 

The children heard of their passing, and they came in numbers – just as they were born. 

They arrived in the state of the art vehicles, caravans for those who have nowhere to sleep, and some tents. 

A flamboyant tent was set up for their friends, who came to share their grief, and neighbours were not even allowed inside. 

They ensured the food was top class, bought the greatest casket, and hosted great gravestones for their parents with pictures, although weary, which they managed to get from the neighbours. 

It was a great funeral, fit for a kingly and queenly send-off.

This and many other untold stories of flashy weddings, funerals, baptisms and merry parties are some of the stories of our lives, which to some with sense will leave us with tears and in awe as to what happened to our societies? 

We have children who have abandoned their parents – despite, these parents are the reasons why we are today. 

These are the parents who have looked after us from babyhood to adulthood through schooling and early morning wakes to ensure we have a bright future. 

We have fashioned western culture from nowhere, whereas we bury our loved ones in flashy coffins with live flowers, and host great tents to remember them with memories that we never created. 

Why would you cherish me in my death, yet when I lived you cared less for me? 

Why abandon your parents and let them live a pauper life, only for you to show them love, when they pass on? 

Why host expensive feasts to remember people, honouring them with great eulogies in the down, yet you never even share a meal with them in their lives? 

Where would we, the dot.com generation, get our blessings from if we only show our parents love when they die? 

We have villages filled with orphans, paupers and all types of destitute people; what are we, the haves, doing to look after them? 

We have students who did well in school but cannot afford varsity, yet I will throw a feast for a day to have a flash wedding sermon or funeral; yet, I have relatives and neighbours who cannot put bread on the table. 

Whose culture are we worshiping? 

The western cultures that we claim to replicate have made peace with this fashion, and their coffin and grave are as small as a matchbox today. 

Wake up, fellow Africans; follow your culture and Ubuntu; we cannot forever remain mentally enslaved by the western culture just so that we can fit in and feel part of them. 

The large headstone we put on our graves is a wastage of money on things that will never advance our future positively. 

Having a fancy wedding or funeral is ceremonial, and although we do it, if the marriage will not last, in this country where the divorce rate is high, it will still not last. 

Feasting fancy and having a great casket or funeral is no show of love, neither is it a ladder to heaven. 

We can fancy up as many funerals as we can afford but if we never showed love to our beloved ones when they lived; they will still not know, as they are not here to testify and acknowledge this post-love in their death. 

Let us show our relatives love while they are alive, so that they can acknowledge it in person; naming a street after them after death is no show of honor or love. 

Let us rather bathe our loved spouses with love in our marriages, than feeding strangers and the enemies we hate during our wedding day. 

Let us wake up from our slumber, else our society will crumble in greed and lust for temporally things. 

Let us be futuristic, rather than having a love for temporal pressure.